Short story long

9.12.00

My friend Jacqueline can really get to the point. I mean, if there is a point, she's probably there now.

Every story she tells me goes something like this: "Well, my sister and brother in law had to do this thing for his work. My sister didn't want to do it because they wanted to come here that weekend, but, long story short, now I'm going to the Quad Cities this weekend."

What happens in the middle? I have no idea.

She also "yadda yadda yaddas" things.

As in, "Joshua was crying a lot, and I thought he was just teething. But Daniel thought he was sick, so we took him to the doctor. Well, yadda yadda yadda, I have to stop eating rice now."

I, on the other hand, know how to make any short story long. You give me a short story; I'll make it long.

This is how I work. An example of a basic story line is as follows: I decided I didn't like my old job, I looked for a new job and found one.

My initial attack always begins with the sharing of background and contextual information.

For example, I start out by saying that I went to see this psychic who is so terrific. (How is this related? You ask yourself) Then, I explain who she is and how she works. I share many (still unrelated) details of my visit with her, when I finally remember to say, "she told me that I needed to start planning my future and going after what I want."

This detour has already lengthened my story by about a factor of ten.

Following the contextual and background information, I proceed to the communication of inner thoughts and feelings.

This might go something like:

"All this was going on around the holidays, and you can imagine what beginning a job search is like at that time of year. Besides, Christmas can be a hard time for me because…" then I relate the lowlights of my Christmas history.

My listener is wondering, "Where is this going?" I'm wondering, too, to be frank, but at some point my narrative reaches the beginning of January, and a Turning Point.

The Turning Point, or T.P., involves some kind of breakthrough that catapults me out of indecision and inactivity.

In this example, it happened when I came clean and told my boss I wanted to start looking for another job. Here I fill in the details of my relationship with whoever is involved in the T.P., in this case my boss, and provide anecdotes to illustrate this person's character and life history.

These are generally unrelated to the heart of my story, like how my boss used to be a hard-drinking hockey and rugby player, and now he's a mild-mannered family man.

I go on to discuss my feelings about the T.P., and how I finally confronted the situation.

In this case, I confessed to my boss about my job search, and said that to give him only two weeks to replace me would be unconscionable, given the unfailing constipation of human resources. This segment concludes with my gushy description of how much freer I felt once I had told him, and how the job search began in earnest.

The part of the story that involves the actions I took, in this case writing my resumé and cover letters, takes up the least amount of time.

That's the part I can make short, along the lines of "So I started sending out resumes and cover letters. I tell you, every cover letter I wrote was better than the last, and the final one I wrote was the one that landed me my job." Two sentences. Why dwell on it?

The only way I might lengthen this (or any) part of the story further is by inserting a Life Lesson.It is an experience I had in the course of these events that exhibits principles that can be universally expounded upon for the edification of any listener.

In the job search story, the Life Lesson was the value of positive visualization, as suggested by my therapist. I relate her recommendation to visualize my perfect job, and the nearly miraculous results of taking her advice to heart.

It may not be the Point, per se, of my story, but can't everyone stand to learn the value of visualization?

I dispense with the details of my success (or failure) to reach my goal, and conclude with my reflections on the culmination of the story. For instance, "The job is okay, but really, I think I want to be a writer."

Personal musings:

Wilderness: Dreams of living in the wild persist and change.

All grown up: At 12 I looked like I was 20, at 24 I looked 15.

Altruism: Can you ever repay the kindness of a stranger?

Photos in a box: A package from my brother turned my memories of childhood upside down.

Short story long: How to lengthen a narrative in a few easy steps.

Writing: Going the distance to find things to write about.

Neighbors: An amazing account of urban generosity.

Snacking: The angst of a healthy diet.

Thoughts on spiritual matters:

Subway preachers: Transcendence on the Red Line.

Thoughts in the Kingdom: How do you keep your mind in heaven and your heart in the world?

After September 11: Response to an attack on a mosque in Bridgeview, Ill., on September 12.